WOOOOO was that a long trip.




so here i am.. back.... and... ya know... alive and all.

i know its been a long long time and i'm pretty sure that no one will even notice... not that it matters that much, i have so so so much going on lately finals are soon, and classes end on he 9th. i'm going to try to submit a few things but first i wanted to tell a little of what was going on.

i think my last entry was about me seeing nick again. well as of now i am 8 months pregnant with his son. ( by the way, i am taking name suggestions...) oo my teacher... heh... ok.. so you wanna know more? just get off your duff and ask.

ahh its really been too long my friends... or.. aquantinces... or.. fellow artist... i dunno, i'm sure no one even remembers me, but thats ok... i'll inte...i'll... work my way back in.

so heres what happened

july 2nd, we had a fourth of july party. which went great, pool, fire,music fireworks, drunkeness...all of the good stuff.

i met my ex...well i should say.. i invited him and his brother, because... well i hadn't seen him in ages and i felt the need to talk to him about what was going on.. why i had left and so on (that is a whole other story that i won't get into now) so he worked late that night but came out after. me.. oh yea i was drunk lol... but anyhoo.. so long long story short we started dating again.... the very next day as a matter of fact.. lol... amazing isn't it? yea well we didn't even realize we were on a date.. but yea.. ok.. so he got me a job where he worked, just a little pizza place, arrezzio's by name, it is.... a great job, true, a bunch of pot heads work there, true, a bunch of kids work there,true again that a bunch of pot head kids work there. but non the less, it was great, you could hang out, make a few pizza's and talk shit about the boss and his shananagains while he was gone. anyhoo... i'm making money i was happy. wow i worked there for a while...but yesterday, i go into work.. oh i failed to mention i got into a wreck.. yea that was great, and we got a lawyer and all... guy ran a red light, no biggie, but uhm.. so i walked into work yesterday and my boss says he's gotta talk to me and proceeds to tell me that this weekend will be our last... he's shutting down the store... now... theres people here... more specifically, jordan, who have been working there for 4 years.. and its the only thing he knows.
and jordan... he's an awesome guy, he is a little crazy at times.. but he has a good heart and values.

so needless to say.. i'm pissed about this.. and still.. i have to be at work at 4 30.. it will be my last night... how lame.

SCHOOLS OUT FOR EVA!!! ooh ok sorry i just had to get some alice out


school isn't out for ever... which is good cuz i will miss my friends like crazy... though its not like we ever hung out much.. but we kept each other up and happy while in class... and shared some things we prolly never should have. for instance me and allysons dumb asses getting drunk at the art show. what can i say? i wanted to be a teenager again for one night. lol

so i started talking to this guy in school that was having a few problems.. but i realize that he was only talking to me because his friends (girls) gave him the cold shoulder for dating this one girl... which is pretty harsh... but i mean.. girls are just stupid like that. they were mad for not giving them as much attention as they deserved. i mean what the hell kinda guy is he for giving his girlfriend attention? huh?! ugh either way.. it was nice while it lasted.. he's a super nice guy he just has the attention span of a worm. (don't hate me for telling the truth)

and Rio... omg... i love him to death...but that man confuses the piss out of me..."breathe" he says "its ok" "I love you." and turns around to say... that love is caring... how does that work exactly? see i was under the assumption that CARING meant CARING..... make sense to you?

and this whole... friend/brother thing is very.. hard to understand.. especially when he won't tell me anything. i want to know what happened to him to make him the way he is now.. but he is unwilling to tell me...maybe because it means so much to him that he doesn't want to share it with me... or more likely because he doesn't really want to remember any of it... but he says that something in me reminds him of something he saw in this brother/friend person.

ugh

my old friends are maybe starting to talk to me again.. its very nice...

i won't say any names in the whole entry besides Rio because people know each other and thats just not nice... to talk about people that people know each other even in front of their face.. but see this way.. only the people that i am talking about know that i am talking about them...

ok

i think that makes sense...
anyway...
you should unsubscribe to this thing because you will never understand what the hell i am talking about.

ahem

where was i?

ok.. the art show is finally over. yay for me... i'll post some when the classes are finally over with.. i have so much going on lately.. i feel like i don't sleep.. oh thats right... because i don't...

i am constantly running.. or at least i feel like it.. if i'm not in class.. i'm doing homework or chasing my son... really.. i'm tired... so tired.. and i just love the unconcerned looks on peoples faces.

so my graphics teacher wants me to put some of my poetry in the litary arts magizine... weird..

my art teacher is trying to get me to start a business in photograpgy and graphics...

wtf is going on here?!
i have no idea...
anyhoot
i completely forgot what i was talking about because someone started talking to me... so i must go before i get too lost and run out of gas...

to see you when i wake up
is a gift
i didn't
think could be real

to know that you feel the same
as i do
is a three-fold utopian dream

you do something to me
that i can't
explain

so would i be out of line
if i said

i miss you

i see your picture
i smell your skin on
the empty pillow
next to mine

you have only been gone
10 days
but already
i'm wasting away

i know i'll see you again
whether far or soon
but i need you to know

that i care

and i miss you



(Incubus)